Off She Goes........

A great number of "first day of school" pictures flooded my news feed a few weeks ago on Facebook. Pictures of fresh faced kids, new haircuts, backpacks, new shoes, clothes and all else that goes with the first day of school. One picture in particular struck a deep place in my heart.  A mom had taken a snapshot of her little girl on her way to kindergarten.  Mom was behind the little girl as she walked down the tree lined sidewalk well on her way.  The caption read, Off she goes.....

While now I look at pictures of my grand kids' first school days I am so reminded of those "first" days of my kids and how life as a parent is well represented in that mom's picture of the little girl walking away.  From just about the first moments of having kids we are training them and getting them ready to....go.  From steadying them as they first sit up, coaxing them to crawl and encouraging them to walk we are teaching  actions that move them away.  The actions we teach evolve from the physical to the intellectual, emotional and spiritual as their life goes on.  But again all these learning experiences are to get them to the point of, moving on. While the moving forward process often can make us sad we need to remember that it is our goal as parents to raise healthy adults who can think, reason, decide and live honorably on their own. In fulfilling those responsibilities of parenthood it becomes a continual process of.... letting go.

I can remember so many moments of being behind my kids and getting that last glance and smile over the shoulder, walking into that classroom, getting on that bus, getting that diploma, boarding that plane, walking back up that isle now united.  Moments of them walking away from we the parents into their next phase of life.  As they walk from one phase to the next my hope and prayer is that we taught them well enough and helped supply tools for them to figure things out.

So, hold their hands as long as you can but when they start to let go, loosen your grip. It doesn't mean that they don't love or appreciate you it just means that you have taught them well and they are confident and ready for the next step. Do the walk aways ever get easier, not really.  Even though you know as a mom it's the right time and place and you're sending them off in the best of circumstances a little piece from your own heart walks with them.  No matter how grown up they are when they turn to walk away the image of that small child with backpack and new clothes and haircut is ingrained in our minds and it's all we can see.  Our arms and hands let go but our hearts never will.

#firstdayofschool #growingup #lettinggo



photo credit:  Thank you Krystin Risch for the use of your lovely photo and caption.

Just a few feet away.....

My friend and I decided on a recent trip to Los Angeles to stop by the corner of Hollywood Blvd. and Highland and see just what we could see. This is the location of the Kodak Theater where the 81st annual Academy Award celebration was taking place. As we had thought many streets were blocked off and security was everywhere. We parked several blocks from the location and set out. Our first few attempts of finding a great "star gazing" spot weren't panning out, so we ventured further. After walking down a few alleys and another block or two we ended up right on the corner of Hollywood and Highland across the street from all the festivities. In fact, the red carpet pretty much takes up the whole intersection. We staked our claim on our spot and did not move for several hours. We, along with many other people were actually invading the area, territory, of a man who obviously called this corner "home". He was behind us just a few feet and randomly yelled out things. All kinds of things. Sometimes funny, sometimes not. We were kinda in his way. In his altered state of mind however he did have the presence to decorate for his uninvited guests. Security had put up a temporary chain link fence to keep the crowds in order. This man, our unwilling host had put up Christmas decorations on the fence. He brought this up a few times, loudly I might add. As the evening unfolded we saw many stars coming and going from the Kodak Theater. They sparkled with all the glitz and glamour that Hollywood is good at. The gowns were beautiful, the men were handsome and it was all the ingredients that a good fairy tale is written from.

As the evening began to wind down and the stars exited the theater, with most of the women carrying their shoes, life started to return to normal. As I stood on this corner and observed an event that is watched by millions from all around the world this thought kept coming to mind. A few feet behind me was a world apart from what was a few feet in front of me. Behind me was a man that somehow life just hadn't worked out the way things were supposed to work. Who knows what his story is that landed him here on this corner of Hollywood and Highland. What great promise and hope did his life possibly at one time posses? Just in front of me were Hollywood's elite. They are beautiful and talented and accomplished and sought after constantly. Ordinary people want to be like them, want to know all about them, want to look like them. They have arrived. I stood on that corner between two very different worlds. Only a few feet separated what felt like two universes. The cameras that were capturing all of the stars and their arrivals and the details of their designer gowns would never turn just a tiny bit and capture the world on the other side of the sidewalk. People viewing at home had no concept of what was just a few feet away. I thought at one moment, which world am I closer to? I'm not part of Hollywood and honestly don't desire to be. Up close, it's really not that glamorous. Maybe I'm really closer to the man behind me. What makes the difference that I am standing here and he is lying down? Grace, good luck, good fortune. God does after all love this man as much as he loves me. Why am I the one standing?

I Love You Cupcakes.....

We were at Crumbs, a cupcake shop in Los Angeles,

not the shop Oprah talked about that would be Sprinkles. We were going to go to Sprinkles but there was a line that was out their door and down the sidewalk due to the power of Oprah....and good cupcakes! We went a few blocks down the same street to Crumbs, shorter line, large variety of cupcakes. They make their own version of the chocolate Hostess Cupcake, the one with the white scrolly icing across the top. I didn't need to look any further, my decision was made. As I was paying for my cupcake (much larger in size and price than the hostess one I might add) I asked the young lady who was waiting on me if she wanted to hear a silly, quick story. She said sure so I proceeded with my story......

" When our kids were very young, we would sometimes get Hostess Cupcakes as a special treat. One of my kids, while they were still toddler age pointed to the white cursive looking icing and asked me what it said. I answered, it says "I Love You". From that moment on we have referred to hostess cupcakes as, I Love You Cupcakes. I continued to tell her that my kids are grown with kids of their own, but guess what they still call these cupcakes......Yup. At some point when they each learned to read I guess they figured out mom had lied to them, or maybe they just thought it had been changed by Hostess, at any rate to our family they will forever be, I love you cupcakes."

As I had finished paying and telling my story I looked up at the young lady, her eyes had become filled with tears. Her response was, that is so sweet. Somehow this little short story had touched something in her heart. I'll never see her again, I don't even remember her name but I hope she remembers that there was a moment of our lives shared that somehow meant something.

Sharing my silly story with that young lady reminded me that there are times to take a moment with the clerk, or the waitress or waiter or whoever we come in contact with and share life. I had the luxury of a couple of minutes this time, but often it's just a few seconds. This reminded me to have a purpose in taking peoples' time. A word, a short story, a kind gesture, a smile could change someone's day or week or perhaps even a life.

So Milo, my 2-1/2 year old grandson was over not long ago and out of the cookie jar chose a hostess Cupcake as a treat. I unwrapped it and handed it to him. He pointed at the white icing and asked, "whats that says Mimi".............And guess what I answered!

DEN OF SPIN

DEN OF SIN SPIN

I have a love/hate relationship with spin class.  It's really good for you, works off lots of calories, helps my outdoor cycling skills and perhaps osteoporosis, ok I'm guessing on the osteoporosis.  Each Spin class has its own climate usually dependent on the Spin Instructor. When I'm not lost in thought or in the Spin Class music I often am having an "in my head" conversation with the instructor.  I've given most of these instructors nick names.  There's Zen Spin lady, Sparkly Spin, Cheer Spin, Nazi Spin, Kind Killer Kelly Spin, Speed Spin and so on.  So with keeping different spin personalities in mind here is how some of my "in my head" conversations have gone.

Spin Person     Good morning, ready to climb some hills?

Me                  Wow you're cheery and look around we're in a room, no hills

Spin Person     Your legs should be talking to you about now, what are they saying?

Me                  They're saying, you're a grandma, you could add a layer of fluff, just let all of this 

                        go.

Spin Person     You're heart rate should be up by now

Me                  Yeah that happened when I bent over to put on my spin shoes.  And why

                       aren't they designed a little more cute?

Spin Person     If you don't put your gear up high enough I'll come around and do it for you.

Me                  You don't have much joy in your life do you?

Spin Person     You should be tapping into your reserve tank about now.

Me                  Where does one go to buy one of those tanks?

I realize this imaginary conversation sounds a bit negative but its really hard to stay positive when you are sweating that much.  As I mentioned before there are many benefits to Spin so much so that I will continue to take part in a class whenever I can.  I have just one burning question, who's idea was it to design the spin room up a short flight of stairs? Walking out and trying to appear like you are in complete control of your limbs without grabbing the rail because people are in the way while wearing ugly spin shoes that are a bit bumpy is an athletic accomplishment within itself.  Don't even get me started on those Spin pants!

See you in class!

          

Top of the Fridge Challenged

One day as I was discussing hair coloring issues with a friend she made a comment that she never noticed that my roots needed touching up. In fact, she didn't ever remember seeing them "undone". I realized of course she never noticed my root situation because she was a bit shorter than me and never really saw the top of my head. What a great reason to seek out those a little shorter than you for friendship. She thinks my hair is always in tip top root shape. This reminded me that there have been times when I'm having company or giving a party that I have thought about those attending and how tall they were and whether or not I needed to clean the top of my fridge. Yes, I really have thought this through on numerous occasions. If it were an evening of shorter friends I didn't clean the fridge, if a few taller ones were coming over I did indeed clean the top of the fridge. I think I've even purposely invited taller folks over now and then just so I would be motivated to do the task.  My fridge top cleaning theory doesn't matter at this time though as our fridge is built in to the cabinets and no one no matter how tall or short can see the top.  Is this design not genius?  Guess I need to have a cabinet built around my roots!

Let's- sit- a- spell

 Went in to Little Caesars to buy some bread-sticks for my grandson Milo. It was really just a take-out place with a few chairs for waiting, no tables set up for dining  in. I paid for the bread-sticks and told Milo we could eat them in the car, but Milo had other plans.

"Want to sit here with me Mimi?"  Milo asked as he was already seated.
"There really isn't a place to eat here, is there Milo?" I answered, thinking he might change his mind.

He was unfazed by the lack of table space, had made himself comfortable and was ready to enjoy his bread-sticks.

"OK, we'll just sit for a while."  I answered

I pushed two of the chairs close together and we snacked on warm bread-sticks.  Our conversation covered the most important of topics that occur in a 4 year old boy's mind.  We discussed the "Little Caesar Man" that was painted on the wall in front of us.  Is he real..... is he a guy..... and as all conversations go with Milo, he isn't bigger than the Hulk because the only one bigger than the Hulk is God.

I love life through the eyes of toddlers.  They are able to size up little things in life that are really of monumental importance.  Want to sit here with me?  Want to watch me?  Those two small questions highlight two very big basic human needs.  I want to feel noticed and I want to have importance.  A few minutes in a kind of awkward seating situation fulfilled those needs.   You are important to me and therefore I want to take this time to sit with you and share bread-sticks and conversation.

In the simplistic part of my brain I want to believe that such seemingly simple acts could cure so much.  I should more often ask the same question of people, all kinds and ages of people.  Want to sit here with me?  Or more importantly I probably should live with the assumption that most people, grown-up people, live with that question in their minds and hearts often but unlike toddlers are more guarded and are too shy to ask.

So soon, find someone, you probably already have someone in mind and ask, want to sit here with me?  Bread-sticks are optional!

She Didn't Like First Grade

Kindergarten had gone exceedingly well. She loved it. She loved being there, she loved learning, she loved helping. She loved her friends and she loved her teacher. Kindergarten was a whole new world of her own. No more hearing older brother stories about school and its activities, she had her own stories to tell. And tell them she did from the moment she got off the bus until she collapsed at night. We knew her teachers every mood and action. We heard who loved who and who didn't love who. We heard who bothered who. She look forward with great anticipation to first grade, because in first grade you get to do real math and read from first grade books.

First grade started off just fine. She loved her teacher, she made new friends and shared some of the same friends from kindergarten. Before long we started to hear complaining. She loved to learn and she loved the social aspect and she began getting phone calls from sweet little voices wondering what she was going to wear the next day. But something was bothering her. It was P.E.. She hated it. She didn't like to run. Nothing physically impaired her, she just didn't like it. They didn't have to do this in kindergarten. This was competition, competition to her anyway. She could have not worried about it but she put it upon herself to be among or try and be among the first five that finished. This running became agony. We told her to relax and not worry that you couldn't be first at everything. The speech didn't work. She fought it and detested it and sometimes around p.e. time went to the nurses office complaining with a stomach ache. If I heard the phrase, "I HATE P.E." once, I heard it a hundred times. The year went on and so did the running. The complaining slowed somewhat and so did the stomach aches. I think she started getting used to it. Everything else was going well. She liked math and spelling and reading. Her teacher was nice too. When the school year was coming to a close she came home one day with a ribbon. It was a ribbon that stated that she had been a participant in the second annual track and field day at her school. (wasn't the right time to bring up that I wished she would have mentioned it so I could have been there) This was totally voluntary. I asked her what she participated in. She said, the 440. The 440, run? Yep. She didn't have to take part in it, she wanted to. She also could have picked a shorter distance to run. She also told me that when she was running she was almost last because her shoe fell off, but when she put her shoe back on she passed a lot of people. I pictured it in my mind like a Hollywood movie ending, I think I could even hear the music.... something like the Chariots of Fire theme song. I hugged her and told her how wonderful I thought it was that she did this. Something that she hated so much, she faced. I told her that she didn't even realize what a grown up thing that she had done.

Later in her life as she faces obstacles I hope to remind her of that 440 run. When she is faced with things that she thinks she can't handle or doesn't want to handle, I'll hope to remind her of how grown up she had been at 7. This also serves as a great reminder to me that as an adult I sometimes need the courage and determination of a child to face what comes along in life.